We meet again...

My my...at Waterloo!

No wait, that's not the vibe I was going for.

My my, hasn't it been a long time. And really, we all know who is to blame for that.

Liz Truss.

Alright alright, maybe we can't blame her for THIS particular economic disaster, but I am finally back - baby - and with a vengeance. Well, with whatever the polite form of a vengeance is, so pretty much a 'rather pressing desire to write' or some such delicate nonsense.

The last 18 months or so have been a rollercoaster. One that on occasion has sent my stomach turning, but one that has also spent several weeks at a time 'closed for maintenance'. It's been a ride, nevertheless.

I came out of drama school with absolutely no plan, much debt, and a lot of creative energy and self-belief. Obviously, all of this withered away in an instant (apart from the debt!) when I entered the professional world of acting and realised it really is as bad as they say it is. Especially post Covid. So in response, my brilliant friend and I set up a theatre company (what else do 20-somethings do when there's no professional work for them...?). This theatre company quickly produced a one-woman play that I am incredibly proud of, and to which I credit both my mental breakdown in early 2022, and my subsequent resurrection of self belief and love of all things theatre. It was probably one of the craziest things I have ever done, and I certainly leapt in the deep end of theatre producing, but once we managed to get The Other onto the stage, I knew that all of the tears (and trust me, there were bucketfuls) were absolutely worth it. A whole community of wonderful people came out of the woodwork to help fund the play, or fill its audiences, and they received it with such open hearts that I couldn't help but feel uplifted by the general greatness of the world.

So that takes us up to Spring 2022 (skirting over some rather dry months where I was unemployed save for a part-time waitressing job). After I had slept for about 3 weeks to make up for the months of job-juggling that brought my play to the stage, I had to re-enter the world post-play. And what a come down it was. It's such a funny industry sometimes, because the highs are like nothing else. I felt like I was made of a shower of gold and walking on air and filled with the light of a thousand suns when I was on stage. The applause burst my heart, and the warm words I received were soothing balm to even the worst injuries or diseases or lack of sleep. But then I came back to reality, and I walked down the street, and no one even turned an eye. Not one standing ovation. Can you bloody believe it? So I had to return back to the part-time muggle job that kept on paying my London rent, and I've been struggling with the muggle juggle ever since. (God forbid I start some sort of Tik-Tok trend with that one)

That being said, this September did bring a big professional acting job for me at the Omnibus Theatre, along with a short film up in Blackpool in October, and potential plans for a mini UK tour of both Cassandra and The Other in Spring 2023. So watch this space, theatrically, I suppose. But all of this comes out of the seemingly never ending well of energy that I fill with casting workshops, monologue learning, sketch writing and acting classes. There is always more to be done. And never enough time or money to do it. It's this draining plug hole, which my dreams and loves have been slowly whirling around, that has led me towards a bit of a crisis of faith. But like all good crises of faith (or, really, like a rather mundane crisis of faith...more of a faith wobble I suppose...) it has lasted but an instant, and by reframing my frustrations I know I can see good things on the horizon once more. Because that's the kind of obscene optimism they pay me for. And they don't even pay me!

I have decided that 2023 is Shakespeare season for me. I am envisioning myself treading the boards at the Globe. I am monologuing in verse and dreaming in iambic pentameter. I am Rosalind. I AM Macbeth. I AM THE BEAR AT THE END OF THE WINTER'S TALE. Sorry, got rather carried away there. But you get the idea. I think, or at least I hope, that by channeling and focussing my energies I can try and make good ground, make an impression, and feel as if I am making some progress. As opposed to throwing things into my well at random, I am going to make a rather neat pile of 'Shakespeare' and see where that gets me. And yes, I am aware that those two metaphors don't work together. Shakespeare would have done better. Something about a flower, or the moon. But then I'm not aiming to be internationally renowned and possibly the best playwright of all time. I just want to get paid to act. Is that so much to ask?

And in amongst all of this chaos, crumbling under catastrophic pressures, and cremating countless cauliflowers (that last bit didn't happen - I am an excellent cook, thank you very much), I also have had a quite incomprehensible overturning of romantic fortune. Aeschylus would be proud of this peripeteia, I'm sure. The early summer 2022 followed on from my newfound sense of "Ooh, look at me, I'm a successful writer and actor, aren't I brilliant", and so buoyed by a potentially false sense of self-confidence, I got back on the dating apps. And continued to despise them. How do I know if I want "Athletic and cat-loving Dylan" or "Baker and late-night boogier Steve"? What is in a profile but any other profile would seem as sweet?!

So, in true Evie-style (by which I mean being wilfully 'just a little bit different') I went speed dating. And had the ridiculous sit-com worthy fortune of meeting someone really rather lovely. 6 months later, here we are, and rather, stupidly, 'are we sure this isn't reality TV' happy. So yes, I am ridiculous. But don't you just love it.

I hope that all this chaos gets me somewhere towards an excuse for my radio silence, and now I have broken my abstinence (in more ways than one, oi oi), I hope that I will write more regularly, so that the 3 random people who read this can continue to enjoy all its silliness and salacious insights.

Till the next time xx